If it took me 30 days to recover from two weeks of depression, what does it take to recover from a massive manic and psychotic episode?
It can take a year for some people. No one wants to hear this, but I believe we need to be honest with ourselves in order to survive bipolar disorder.
I recently banged through: 2014 Dad dies before Christmas, 2015 Moved to TX (late that year, recovering from it all), 2016 Hail destroys the house (six months later I’m getting back on track work/book 8600 new words), AND then 2017 Mom gets sick (and I add another anti-d), announces cancer at thanksgiving (still has a dramatic flair), gets all Kevorkian (did not need all that imagery), then cancer/starvation downhill quickly into 2018…
Not much left to do about anything but a purge of old, a completion of getting things back in order; a quick clean up and prepare for Lent – how? I’m not sure. People are handling the estate stuff and I worry.
Current mood is hypomanic (moderately ‘happier’), fighting off depression, oscillating between being pissed at something or happy about something. Worrying about the chasm of crappy emotion that splashes up a bit still as it settles.
Patience doesn’t come naturally for me. I tend to put myself down for not being able to work much these last few years, but man-oh-man, this is a darn serious illness. It’s stunning how something as simple as forcing myself up at an early hour leads to better overall “purposefulness” (persistence of willpower) to  the day…